Bhagavad Gita is a holy scripture which contains answers to every problem. That is also why people tend to follow the advice Bhagavad Gita offers blindly. The problem is that rather than reading the scripture itself, people tend to find the answers to their specific problems on the internet.
For sure Bhagavad Gita demystifies every aspect of life with the divine knowledge imparted by God Krishna himself, but it’s not as direct as you may imagine. So the first question should be – is there really any mention of marital wisdom in the Srimad Bhagavad Gita?
For that, here is the context of why and when Bhagavad Gita was spoken.
In the middle of the battlefield in Kurukshetra where an epic battle was about to begin between Kauravas and Pandavas, one of the greatest warriors in the Pandavas’ army, Arjun, was consumed by self-doubt. He was in a trance, struggling to understand the reason why they were about to fight. He didn’t desire material riches, so why was he about to embark on a war against his loved ones? He wondered – The catastrophe the war would bring, because of its sheer scale, is it even worth fighting?
In this internal dispute, Lord Krishna came to his rescue and recited to him the answers that he sought. The conversation then came to be known as the Bhagavad Gita.
Any person with good common sense can figure out that marriage is the last of the questions a person might ask under such circumstances. In fact, here are the fourteen questions that Arjuna asked during his conversation with Krishna in the Bhagavad Gita.
What Are Arjuna’s Questions to Krishna in the Bhagavad Gita?
- O slayer of Madhu, and slayer of foes, how shall } fight Bhisma and Drona, with arrows, on the battlefield? Both of them are worthy of our worship. (Chapter 2, Verse 4)
- O Kesava, what is the mark of a person of steadfast wisdom, who realises (sthitaprajiia) God? How does such a man of firm wisdom, speak, sit and how does he walk? (Chapter 2, Verse 54)
- If you think that knowledge is superior to action, O Janardana (Krsna), why then do You make me do a dreadful deed, O Kesava (Krsna)? With your complex words You seem to bewilder my mind; therefore, tell me plainly the one principle, by which I may attain the highest good. (Chapter 3, Verse 1and 2)
- But, why is a man impelled to commit sin, as if by force, even against his will, O Varsneya (Krsna)? (Chapter 3, Verse 36)
- You are of recent origin, while the birth of Vivasvan dates _ back to remote past. How then am I to understand, that Thou did declare it to him, in the beginning? (Chapter 4, Verse 4)
- O Krsna thou praisest, the renunciation of actions externally (Sankhyayoga) as well as their unselfish performance (Karmayoga), tell me, for certain, which one of the two is decidedly conducive to my good. (Chapter 5, Verse 1)
- O Krsna, he who, though of faith, is lax in his striving and whose mind deviates from Yoga, having failed to attain perfection in it, what end does he meet? (Chapter 6, Verse 37)
- O mighty-armed, the deluded and fallen in the path of God, without any hold, upon the world does he not perish like a broken cloud, deprived of both God-realization and worldly enjoyment? (Chapter 6, Verse 38)
- What is that Brahma? What is Adhyatma? What is Karma (Action)? O Best among men! What is said to be Adhibhuta and what is called Adhidaiva? Who and how is Adhiyajiia, here in this body, O Krsna? And how can You be realized, at the time of death, by persons of steadfast mind? (Chapter 8, Verses 1 and 2)
- How may I realize You, O Master of Yoga, by constant meditation on you? In what various aspects are you, O blessed Lord, to be meditated upon by me? (Chapter 10, Verse 17)
- Tell me, who You are, so fierce in form. I bow deeply to You, O Supreme Deity, be kind. I wish to know You, the Primal One, in your essence (tattva), for I do not understand Your objective. (Chapter 11, Verse 31)
- Those devotees who, ever steadfast, thus worship the (Saguna) and those again, who worship only Imperishable and the Unmanifest (Nirguna) which of them are better versed in Yoga? (Chapter 12, Verse 1)
- What are the marks of him, who has transcended the three gunas (modes), O Lord? What is his conduct like? How does he transcend, the three modes? (Chapter 14, Verse 21)
- Those who not caring for the ordinances of scriptures, perform sacrifice (yajna) in good faith – what is their position, O Krsna! Is it sattvic (goodness), rajasic (passion) or tamasic (ignorance)? (Chapter 17, Verse 1)
- O Mighty-Armed, O Inner-controller of all, O Slayer of Kesi, I desire to know severally, the true nature of Sannyasa (Sankhayoga) and of Tyaga (Karmayoga). (Chapter 18, Verse 1)
- The translation is taken from Srimad Bhagavad Gita Sadhak Sanjeevani Gita Press
This means there is no direct wisdom in Bhagavad Gita on marriage. Nonetheless, Bhagavad Gita is a source of divine wisdom and some verses can be interpreted to answer marital affairs. We have listed them below.
What Instructions in the Bhagavad Gita Can Be Used Indirectly in Married Life?
While reading Bhagvad Gita, you came across detailed instructions by God Krishna on how to live in this dukhalayam (house of sufferings). Some of these instructions can be implemented to lead a happy marital life, it goes like:
- Chapter 2, verse 14 explains that happiness and distress will come in life like seasons. They arise from sense perception and one must learn to tolerate them. A married couple can learn to be calm in life’s ups and downs knowing that it is part of life itself.
- Chapter 3, verses 12 and 13 describe that celestial gods fulfill our necessities in life when we perform sacrifices. A person should always eat the food after offering it to god, not just for the sense-enjoyment. A married couple should follow this practice to spiritualize the eating process for their benefit.
- Chapter 16 describes the distinction between divine and demoniac beings by putting forward their qualities respectively. This chapter includes various instructions on how to live a successful and happy life which can directly be adopted in a married life by humans.
What Other Scriptures Talk About the Married Life of a Human Being?
Vishnu Puran , Third Ansh – Chapter 11 and 12 describes the code of conduct in one’s married life in great detail. It covers the following sub-topics:
- When to wake up in the morning.
- The process for freshening up and purifying oneself in the morning.
- The process for satisfying elders, teachers, gods, and various living entities in otherworldly realms through prayers, aachmana, and food charity.
- How to attend to guests at home, including monks and saints, and the importance of properly hosting guests for one’s own benefit.
- When, how, and what one should eat in married life for a healthy mind and body.
- When to engage with one’s spouse in married life.
- The daily routine of a person.
- How one should dress.
- How to speak and conduct oneself.
- Whom to befriend and what kinds of people to avoid.
- How to behave in society.
- When and how one should speak the truth and when one should not.
And so on…
The list is huge and filled with wisdom. While there is very less that is said in Bhagavad Gita on marriage, there are numerous texts that describes married life duties and conducts in great details.
The important thing to remember here is that all scriptures wants to direct a person towards spiritual liberation. And hence, the instruction we find in these texts on marriage also serves the same purpose.
